Step one (Night-time):
Wake up in the middle of the night screaming "Mummy, come on" like I've been keeping you waiting or something.
"Carry Me, carry me carry mecarrymeCARRYME!" etc.
Lie across the bed
Step Two (Morning):
Wake up late and in a bad mood, thus throwing the morning (finely tuned) routine out the window, into the rain, into the path of several fast moving vehicles who fail to stop and leave any attempt to revive the routine as likely as drying your washing outside this summer.
Insist that sweets for breakfast is perfectly acceptable and all young people should consider this as their diet of choice forever more.
Sabotage all creative crafty activities with wild sweeping movements of the arms and hands, defying previously accepted laws of nature relating to length of arms relative to age and body size, and deftly launching the (open) glitter pot ceiling-ward.
Step Three (Afternoon):
Build a tower with your sandwiches, expertly recreating the leaning tower of Pisa in the year 2045 (estimated) five seconds before it finally topples over.
Throw a tantrum in the library when it is suggested that Alien is an inappropriate film choice, by whipping all the DVDs off a shelf and then shuffling them as I fruitlessly attempt to return them to the shelf in alphabetical order.
Fall asleep precisely 5 minutes before tea-time.
Is it just me? Did I fail the terrible twos exam? What's been your worst terrible twos day?