Saturday 14 September 2013

So different


You are a completely different model. So different in personality and temperament to your brother and sister. Your own person with a will so infuriatingly stronger than mine.

I start the day with an energy, ready to cajole and nudge you in the direction I need you to go; to the breakfast table, to the bathroom, into your clothes and out of the door. Within 30 minutes I am spent, mental exhaustion renders me impatient with a tendency to shout. 
Why won't you do anything I ask? Why do you laugh as I chase you round the table with your coat in my hands? Why can't you see how tired I am?
Because you are three. And it's all a game.

When your big brother and sister were three they played games too, but not with my emotional wellbeing. They played with toys.
They would do what I needed them to do, without shouting or tears. At least, that's how I remember it. Why are you so different?
Because you are you. And I need to remember that.
I need to learn how to be a different mum for you. One who can be a little more patient. One who has some new tricks up her sleeve. One who can take a few deep breaths.
I'll try. 
In the meantime, will you please just put on your coat!

1 comment:

  1. Lovely post and totally feel your pain with my own bundle of defiance! x

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Oooh, I do like a good comment :-)